How To Find A Good Matchmaker
A good matchmaker dreams that every client will find true love. They not only have their client’s best interests at heart, but they help them become the best version of themselves, coach them through each date and phase of their relationship, keep them self-aware, offer tough love, and make sure they’re open-minded. They’re a concierge, image consultant, therapist, big sister, and best friend all rolled into one.
A good matchmaker really gets to know you
A good matchmaker really gets to know each client on a deep, personal level. We want to understand who they are and learn their likes/dislikes so we can find them someone who could become a true life partner. I’ve worked as a matchmaker for over 20 years, and this process is always an important and personal journey for my clients, so it’s essential that they trust me. Many of my clients share things they won’t tell anybody else, and I begin gaining that trust during my two initial consultations, which are always in-person.
My first consultation lasts approximately an hour, and it’s a get-to-know-you session where I learn about their lifestyle and values. I want to know about their family, their education, and their job. I inquire about their hobbies, interests, and passions. I even ask if they like animals or do any charity work. And, of course, I learn about past relationships and why they ended. Everything is important. Then, we move on to what they want in a partner. Age, height, and religion are just the beginning – I also want to know their type. Do they hate doctors and love lawyers? Do they prefer an introvert or extrovert? What about charisma or sense of humor? I even ask if hair is important!
The second consultation is the fun part where they get to see a curated list of potential matches. I provide photos and bios, and we spend time together discussing each potential match.
A good matchmaker goes to the ends of the earth
A good matchmaker does anything and everything to find the best matches for their client. I use a variety resources when searching for the right candidates. That means that I’m constantly networking, attending events, asking for recommendations, and more. When I discover people who may be a good match for some of my clients, I always conduct an in-person screening to make sure they’re somebody I want to pair with my clients.
A good matchmaker is your image consultant and dating coach
Good matchmakers help you put your best foot forward. I provide my clients with the resources necessary to create fabulous, authentic pictures. I also put my fashion background to use – I look through my client’s closet to suggest date outfits and take them out for a shopping day. And, I’ll send clients to my hairdresser and makeup artist if needed. When your hair is freshly blown, your makeup looks great, and you’re wearing something phenomenal, you’ll feel great and have more confidence.
All good matchmakers know that communication is the most important part of their business. I coach my clients before a date and give feedback after. We talk and have an actual conversation, not a text exchange. I give my clients honest feedback, and we discuss any habits, like spending too much time on their phone, not asking their date questions, or ordering the most expensive thing on menu – that needs to be tweaked. I’m a big proponent of tough love, but I don’t want to take their confidence away. Dating makes people feel vulnerable. If your date doesn’t want to see you again, that hurts – it’s a form of rejection. I pair feedback with encouragement and remind them that we’re moving onward and upward together. I’m always in their corner!
A good matchmaker is always there for you
A good matchmaker works individually with each client according to their needs. I work really hard for my clients and give them everything I can. I’m on their side, and I’m always available to talk. The more we talk, the more I learn about what they do and don’t like. I give each person everything I can – I’ve even coached people until they walk down the aisle. I don’t ever give up, and I don’t let them give up either. I’m always hopeful and optimistic. I’m their biggest cheerleader. A good matchmaker wants only the best for their clients. I want to find the perfect match as much as they do, even as much as their mother does. I want to make this happen. I want to dance at their wedding. I want to hold their child. That’s how you know you’ve found a good matchmaker.